Dear Kemi,
After having a fantastic courtship, I got married to my wife and vowed to live the rest of my life with her. Shortly after our marriage, our bed was abandoned and even my food. My advice and warning were not heeded and I became disenchanted. I decided taking time off the home and on my return, hoping that she would have learnt some lessons, I discovered that she was having a relationship! I begged her to reveal her lover so that I would tell him to stop seeing my wife, but she never did; rather, she left for work and never returned. Her excuse was her busy schedule. We have a child and my vows are still intact and I don’t want a break in my marriage.
O.P
Lagos
Before taking time off your home, did you contact her parents or family members to intervene? Obviously, she did not learn anything from your ‘leave’. Who knows, she could have done this to ‘teach you a lesson’ too! In marriage, two wrongs never make a right and it’s very important to nip issues in the mud before it escalates beyond repairs. Forget the fact that she would reveal the lover. Even if you know him, that would not solve the problem. The main issue is getting your wife back. This may not be an easy task because when a woman resorts to getting a lover outside her marriage, curbing her is Herculean, especially if it has reached the level of abandoning the matrimonial bed. You can still contact family members and your spiritual clerics for intervention. It’s not too late for that.