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DATING (JUST SINGLES)

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DATING (JUST SINGLES)

Kemi Ashefon by Kemi Ashefon
9 years ago
in Newsmakers
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Your first date, your first impression
It was obvious Donatus was excited about his first meeting
with Kelly. Ever since his cousin introduced them over the phone, they had
countless conversations and when she agreed to go on a date with him, he
immediately fantasised about her. Having seen a few pictures of her, he summarily
deduced that she was a well mannered young lady. Little wonder, he left nothing
to chance when he began to prepare for their meeting—bought a new shirt and got
a fresh haircut.
 “I arrived at the
eatery early enough and when she walked in, I buried my head in shame. She
looked so unkempt! While exchanging pleasantries, I noticed that she had an
unpleasant mouth odour and stained teeth! What! This was a far cry from what I
expected. I made a mental note not to see her again and left the venue earlier
than I scheduled under the pretence that there was an emergency I had to attend
to,” he said.
Bisi and Efe had only been friends for less than four
months when they decided to see if they could grow their relationship. When the
former proposed an outing, the latter jumped at the offer without thinking
twice. Their destination was at a beach and all was going well (or so it seemed)
until they settled down under a tent to enjoy the fresh breeze and that was
when Efe’s woes began.
“We could not have any meaningful conversation. She almost
bore me to death with tales of how bad her ex treated her. I did not want to
shut her up because that would look rude so the few times I managed to steer
our conversation towards delightful topics, I found out she was not done
whining about her troubles.”
Jude would easily make the list of one of the most eligible
bachelors in town. You could imagine what happened when he invited Anita to a
fun outing with him. She could not keep the news away from her friends
especially since the prospects of being his bride stared at her in the face.
“My heart leapt for joy when Jude asked me to accompany him
on a night out,” she said. She added, “We went to this cosy restaurant in Victoria
Island and after our meal, I noticed Jude was using some of his fingers to pick
his teeth instead of using the toothpicks! Meanwhile, his other fingers were on
my thighs! I was disgusted, told him so but got another shocker when he dropped
me at home—he forced a kiss on me and reached for my breasts. Did I forget to
add that he was tipsy from too much alcohol?”
Let’s
get talking
A
first date is any type of initial meeting between two individuals whether or
not previously acquainted. It is a time to make the right impressions and being
your first time together, you don’t want to make it your last.  It is sensible that you show up on time.
Nothing is more inconsiderate than making your date wait. If you need to
reschedule, call as far in advance as possible—at least a few hours’ notice. If
you’re running even a little late, send a text.
While
on your first date, a good look is not optional. Endeavour to wear clothes that
make you feel good. New clothes always help but if not new, be sure they are
clean, pressed, and fit well. Wear clothes that make you feel the most
comfortable but still look presentable. First dates are not time to admit to
all the vulnerabilities and insecurities that regularly beset you.
Act
naturally by talking to your date as you would to a friend. This is not the
time to put up unnecessary airs. You can tell jokes, funny stories and
generally be yourself.
However,
leave potty humour, sex stories and bodily functions at home. Ask engaging
questions and be creative about it. Your date will appreciate the chance to go
beyond the usual first-date subjects. Be a good listener and not a dominant
speaker—A man likes a woman who isn’t a conversation hog and so does a woman.
If he talks about how all of his ex girlfriends
are bitter, selfish, man-hating crones, imagine their side of the story. If he
admits to not being the marrying kind, that’s valuable information to have
early on as well. Be polite. Even if your date is the most boring companion,
he/she still deserves your kindness and respect. Stay for one drink or more and
participate in the conversation.
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