DEAR KEMI,
I don’t trust my wife!
I am in my mid 30s and married to a woman, who is of same
age for about five years. I am based abroad while she is in Nigeria. The
problem I am having is that I just don’t trust her! I always feel she is
sleeping around.
age for about five years. I am based abroad while she is in Nigeria. The
problem I am having is that I just don’t trust her! I always feel she is
sleeping around.
Really, I don’t have any concrete proof for my
suspicions but it has always being there from the beginning of our
courtship before I left the country and returned from my base outside
Nigeria to marry her. When I told her about my suspicions, she denied all the
allegations and always had ready-made answers to every question. Sometimes, I
wonder if I was charmed into marrying her. Is this normal? Please, help, I am
really troubled.
H.I.G
Since you
have not caught her with any man or got reports from anyone about your wife’s
illicit affairs, I think you have to dismantle the mind-set of infidelity in
you. In any relationship, especially where the two partners are not living
together in the same place, there are cases of suspicions and rumors. It is now
left for those involved to be determined to make the relationship work. Why not
learn to trust your wife? Or are there things you have not divulged to me? That
you even feel you were charmed into marrying her is wrong and could cause
cracks in your home. Give her the benefit of the doubt and stop accusing her. I
have discovered in most relationships, infidelity could spring up from
unnecessary accusations. A faithful partner could be encouraged to having
affairs when accusations abound. He/she feels
I-have-been-accused-of-it-so-why-not-do-it? Trust is a vital virtue in
marriage, do all you can to inculcate it in yours. Although this should not
stop any form of inquiries when you get suspicious of your partner.
have not caught her with any man or got reports from anyone about your wife’s
illicit affairs, I think you have to dismantle the mind-set of infidelity in
you. In any relationship, especially where the two partners are not living
together in the same place, there are cases of suspicions and rumors. It is now
left for those involved to be determined to make the relationship work. Why not
learn to trust your wife? Or are there things you have not divulged to me? That
you even feel you were charmed into marrying her is wrong and could cause
cracks in your home. Give her the benefit of the doubt and stop accusing her. I
have discovered in most relationships, infidelity could spring up from
unnecessary accusations. A faithful partner could be encouraged to having
affairs when accusations abound. He/she feels
I-have-been-accused-of-it-so-why-not-do-it? Trust is a vital virtue in
marriage, do all you can to inculcate it in yours. Although this should not
stop any form of inquiries when you get suspicious of your partner.